Can It Be Thursday…PLEASE?!?

[With The SCAR Project premiering in Birmingham this week, quite a few of the SCAR girls are heading south with the birds and tide…and the blazers for the cocktail party artist reception this Friday night at UAB’s Visual Arts Gallery. SCAR girl Sara is one of the many flocking together for the event. She worked out her pre-flight details in today’s guest post, which is also published on her blog: That Girl…tales from the edge.]

by Sara Bartosiewicz-Hamilton

This is my life…I had my implants removed mid-December…based on how I felt, I didn’t think I would be ready. At first, I thought I wouldn’t be ready because I would be self-conscious. After the fact, I thought I wouldn’t be ready because I wasn’t recovering as quickly. Either way, I thought I would not be going to the latest SCAR Project exhibit…and then…I woke up Friday with this urge. I wanted to be with my SCAR family…I wanted to see the photos…I wanted to be there. So, I texted my hubby who was getting off his 12 hour shift and headed to sleep in the parking lot of his barber until the shop opened…
I need an honest opinion of trying to go to Birmingham for a few days next week for the SCAR exhibit – I can’t explain it. I just feel the need to go. 

And I just waited…I know I am spontaneous. I can change in a moment. Ahhh, such is life with me. The heart-warming part is the part where my hubby tries to understand, doesn’t always get there but has learned it is usually best to just let me go in whatever direction I’m trying…it may not work but NOT trying is usually worse. I was prepared for his opinion that this may not be best, I’m still not fully recovered…and, I had told myself, if this was his opinion, I needed to listen to him. Thankfully, he got home and told me to buy the ticket…do you know how quickly this can be done??? Within fifteen minutes, actually…flight booked, hotel called. And I’m headed to BAMA!!

This exhibit is a bit different – it started yesterday, the gala event isn’t until Friday. What this means? I’m not arriving until Thursday but am seeing photo after photo of the pictures being hung. I’m going NUTS!!! I just want to be there…I want to take them all in…each time is a little different, who is hanging, who they are hanging by. This time we have new photos and new sisters to welcome. I.can.NOT.wait.

So, I guess I’m doing a bit of my prep work here…online. And, I thought I would share with everyone else what this is like…in all sincerity, I truly believe EVERY single person in the world should be able to experience a SCAR Project exhibit because it is like no other. The photos grab you…meeting people…the love in the room…we love each other like family…the kind of family you actually want to be around. The SCAR models talk about the photos, we talk about our journeys but we really want to talk to you. What made you come see the exhibit? How did you hear about it? What do you think? Do you have cancer? Did you? Have you been touched by cancer? Maybe a friend…a cousin…your mom…tell me about your experience. Tell me what the photos mean to you from the perspective of your journey. It becomes one major love-fest and every single time I walk away blown away by the people I had the honor to meet and the stories I was able to hear.

The first exhibit, I was too nervous…I was welling up…and I am an ugly-crier. So, when the exhibit came to Cincinnati (still had to spell that twice to get it right!), I went to the gallery the moment I arrived. I thought if I was around the photos, I could get those emotions moving so I could be composed at the event. It worked. You know the feeling of coming home to your own bed after a trip? That’s the feeling I get when I walk into a gallery with the SCAR photos. I know the stories and the person behind most of the photos…I want you to love them as much as I do. But it also makes me reflect on my BRCA journey and the impact cancer has had on my life and in the lives of those I cherish…so it is a lot flying through my mind.

Those emotions are flying as I watch the pictures go up on facebook of the photos being hung in the gallery. The space is beautiful, as always. The photos grab me. I am “awww”ing at who is being hung by whom. I am wanting to reach out and touch the photo of my friend Gabrielle who was with me the day my photograph was taken…I am wanting to hug a SCAR sister as we look at Jolene’s photo.

I have never met or heard of anyone who was not changed by attending the exhibit.

I am incredibly excited. Can you tell?

People are never sure what to expect. I understand completely. Before the first exhibit, I was seriously stressed. What do I wear? What will it be like? Will I know anyone? I was grateful to have my youngest sister go with me and met up with two of my SCAR sisters who had their photographs taken on the same day so we knew each other. I didn’t even worry about my attire this time – I’m more concerned with every OTHER day since I haven’t figured out my summer attire with no implants…it is winter in Michigan so I can pull off a scarf every day.

Wear what you are comfortable in. You want to be in full on cocktail attire? You will fit in. You are more comfortable in jeans? You will fit in. Somewhere in between? You.will.fit.in. The reality is the photos take center stage and I don’t remember what anyone wears. Often times, I don’t remember what I am wearing until I start being tagged in photos. I actually changed into soccer slides last year because I had ridiculous heels on that I was not making it in. So, perhaps that is my one caution, wear shoes you want to be standing in for four or more hours. We’ll see if I’ve made the right choice this time.

I’m not on the wall but I will sign
my photo in the book!!

I am so excited because a different sister will be joining me. Sharing this with those I love is like sharing one of the most sacred places of my heart. There is a bond with everyone in that room – I hope you are able to come. It is definitely not something you want to miss.

I will see you in Birmingham, Alabama!! (I am thankful I can spell this location without issue!!)

[If you are in the area, please be our guest at the artist reception Friday night. The event is free but please R.S.V.P. Click HERE for more info and to R.S.V.P. to the event.]

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About joulesevans

Occasionally radioactive with a chance of superpowers. I use them to fight cancer. Also I write. My first book Shaken Not Stirred...a Chemo Cocktail is available on Amazon and Kindle. I'm currently working on a sequel to Shaken, a figuring out life after cancer/travel memoir about a bucket list road trip I took of Route 66.

2 responses to “Can It Be Thursday…PLEASE?!?”

  1. Nancy says :

    I am always so thrilled to read the posts here that I have to send a thank you for all that comes from the SCAR project. The project and the women involved all give so much that we are all very very fortunate to be able to hear your words and see your faces. I am going to get to one of the exhibits one of these days but until then I am sharing the excitement along with Sara and all of the courageous women of the SCAR Project. Thank you again.

  2. Nellie Durand says :

    I found your blog by following threads from a posting on Breastcancer.org. about this exhibit. I was aware of the SCAR project and had seen some of the portraits. Thank you for making me more acquainted with this project and some of the women partaking in it. Your posts and postings of their stories have made a difference in my perspective about my own scarred body. It’s been difficult to find any “positive” aspects of having cancer. A glaring one that I could not see before, is that I’ve lived 70 years cancer free. I now realize my good fortune in having had so very many and cannot even fathom what life would’ve been had cancer invaded my young body.

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